Right now even at work, cun help but suddenly feel the sunken feeling again. Emotional roller coaster at work again. I teared for awhile. This morning, I told him I will be going out with another guy on V day. He has no answer. Maybe cos he is tired of everything like wat his nick refer to ? Or he just simply dun care anymore ? I missed him terribly but I know I cun do anything at all. The sharp words that im "nian" (sticky) pierced my heart again. I hate myself for being like dat. I hate myself for being weak in r/s.
All I ever wanted in life is just for someone simple to love me and in turn I loved him back. I wanna bore children wif tis person, cook for him, laughed with him, hand-in-hand and walked down the aisle. I cun understand but ask God, why is this happening to me again. All I ever did was to love him. Is it wrong to love a person ? This time, I never break anyone heart anymore tis time. Why is this happening to me again ? Am I really that terrible ? I tot I have put it down on Monday, but it never did left me. How long would it take again for me to get tis over with ?
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