Reflections of 2009

In 2009,

I learnt about love. Love does not mean there will be reciprocity at times. Love hurts more than without it at times too. I fell in love with someone dat I knew it to be so wrong from the beginning. The lessons it had taught me nv ever to venture out of God's boundaries are far more valuable to me tis day. Love... God's love is unending despite I hurt Him ever so often. Human love... Frens are angels sent by God to allow u to move thru life easier..

I learnt about courage. The courage to move on despite how difficult it may seem. Not just in my own life. But in the lives of others. Tis yr, my fren's marriages are breaking apart... But despite that, God nv fails to give them the courage to face it all. Yes, tears flowed, hearts r broken... But seeing them faced it all meant to me more than anything else. I am jus privileged to ride thru the storms with them.

I learnt about letting go. Letting go is perhaps the hardest thing I ever have to face. But I did. I learnt that keeping the memories locked up in a part of the heart and giving blessings to others r more meaningful than just dwelling at things which is impossible. Now, i managed a smile whenever the memories came flooding by but it will not stop me from stepping out.

I learnt about the meaning of money. Once, i was persecuted by the one I loved as being ignorant and unwise in managing finances. Little by little, i realized that money cannot make the world go round but it can assist in some ways to lessen the sufferings u faced daily. I am just hoping for nxt yr, i can manage my finances more wisely and in time to come, begin to use it to fulfill the dreams of my life.

All in all, yr 2009 was not a good yr for me but I thanked God for His everlasting love and patience towards a rebellious me.. I believed that 2010 will be a better yr ahead and of cos, more lessons learnt... hopefully happier ones.. :)

Into the 3rd week

THis is the 3rd week of my new job. Faced with an extremely stress situation today wif the customer... Well, more of like maybe jus internal team. How do I lead them to finish what they have agreed to ? How do I lead such a big team ? Today, I started to feel I enjoyed talking more to the engineers rather than to my own team. But Im no longer an engineer... I need to be able to get out of my Engineer shell and starts learning how to lead them being the Program person...

In program management, it is really abt customer service and working as a team internally. This is the first time I start to think that those customer service officer are not really having it easy dealing wif picky and choosy ones. Well, everything has a first. Since I chosen this path, there is no way back.... This path is really wat God has given me. Putting me on track to the vision I had for myself... Totally in-line with wat I had planned for the next 2 yrs of my life..

However, am I really happy here ? Environment vs job prospect.. Relationship vs communications... How do I balance it ? The tough environment in the rural part of Sg.. Can I really have the tenacity and strength to go on ? Put it this way, do I wanna be here for another minute of my life ? Hmm... The answer is....

Back to blogging

Just came back from Dr John Avazini. He seem to age quite abit from the last I saw of him... But once again, his msg blew my mind away.. Windows of heaven r once again open in my life... I given the biggest offering I ever had in my 11 yrs walk wif God... I do not know wats gonna happen, but somethings will definately happen and its for the better, i believe..

Back to my updates, well.. Some things had change from the way it is.. I been transferred to Joo Koon branch and now in a different industry all together... At least, I do not have to scurry to search for a new job but can take my pick now... The place is super retro with all the 80s setting - dark brown cupboards and tables that you can only find in the 80s movie. In addition, that place is like North Pole, winter 24/7 a year... at least the place where I sat...

Back to point 2, I didnt know it will happ again... Once again, I felt in my Spirit he will be changing his number soon. Just as I was having dinner wif Agnes, he msg me for the change of number... Why ? I had moved on... Why does God allow me to know wat he gonna do next ? Why does God allow me to feel his life again ? His life should have already belonged to someone else, not mine to feel anymore and I definately had moved on.. But why does his presence still linger... I really do not know my Lord's plan...