To me, yesterday was a terrible day for myself.Maybe the only consolation was to meet vincent for dinner. He tried his utmost best to cheer me up. I managed a smile or 2 but it still did not still the waves and storms within my heart.
My boss did the most ridiculous thing ever. Im supposed to go Hungary for 2 weeks initially and come back for 1 mth and then be there once again 5 weeks. Well, alot of pple i talked to might think this is a chance of a lifetime to go Europe for free. However, they do not know the fine details of it. The fact of the matter is that Im going there for fire-fighting exercise and so far, by the reactions from the europeans, I would think they are not welcoming me cos im there for continuous improvement but they r reluctant for changes.
Well, what makes me really mad is that my boss actually shirks responsibilities and hide in Malaysia. Originally he is supposed to cover my duties at the 3rd and 4th weeks. But he actually changed his schedule so he can go back earlier and I have to extend my stay !! I really really dun wan to stay there all alone... Efforts to change jobs are however slowed due to a market slowdown. I really dun want to be there for so long. Away from home, frens etc... Missing xmas here... As tears rolled down my eyes, I told God all these but all I got was just silence. Who can actually take me out of this predicament ? Once again, this qn will be dropped into the deep black abyss cos I know no one can help me at all except myself and hopefully God will give me strength... :(
Friday, September 26, 2008
Monday, September 22, 2008
So Duhhhh....
This blog is entirely about what happened over the weekend. Not only do I get a bad diarrhoea from the cell group curry chicken we all scurried over after the heavy msg Wendy delivered, but also some people in the past that makes me just furious.
Though I could understand the awkwardness arised from the misunderstandings so so so long ago, I feel that at the baseline, we could still be frens once again. I could see ur bo chap face when we past by each other a few times (maybe only once outside the toilet). U delibrately avoided any eye contact and I was thoroughly bothered when you did not bother to fake a Hi to me. Haiz.. What exactly is wrong here ? Maybe it has always been my wishful thinking that after breaking up we could still be frens so such awkwardness will not happen when we mit each other at church. However, such a long time has since past, but yet I cun help but feel that all avoidance is neccessary.
As I told sammie about what happened, the only advice she had was everything in life is not as perfectly as we dreamed of. Some pple just doesnt bothered anymore and they dun wish to include u in their frens catergory. Haiz, as I listened, I felt that it is entirely so true. Life is not always what i expected it to be. To be frens after breakup is really my own wishful thinking. Maybe I ought to grow up more.
Though I could understand the awkwardness arised from the misunderstandings so so so long ago, I feel that at the baseline, we could still be frens once again. I could see ur bo chap face when we past by each other a few times (maybe only once outside the toilet). U delibrately avoided any eye contact and I was thoroughly bothered when you did not bother to fake a Hi to me. Haiz.. What exactly is wrong here ? Maybe it has always been my wishful thinking that after breaking up we could still be frens so such awkwardness will not happen when we mit each other at church. However, such a long time has since past, but yet I cun help but feel that all avoidance is neccessary.
As I told sammie about what happened, the only advice she had was everything in life is not as perfectly as we dreamed of. Some pple just doesnt bothered anymore and they dun wish to include u in their frens catergory. Haiz, as I listened, I felt that it is entirely so true. Life is not always what i expected it to be. To be frens after breakup is really my own wishful thinking. Maybe I ought to grow up more.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Vanessa's Wedding
My Frens in Nursery ! All gorgeous babes.. :)
My Dearie Sammie !!! (P.S the church is absolutely gorgeous for weddings ! )
Monday, September 08, 2008
Some peace
As I was about to step ahead to my life's 3rd business trip, I went into deep deep thoughts. The few mths in Hungary alone will definately draw me closer to God. However, will I ever be a new person when Im back ? Will I, like wat I prayed at the beginning of the year, be able to forget whatever that has held me back for almost 2 yrs ? I dun really know the answer but just have to anticipate that God will take care of it.
I have mixed feelings now. A part of me wanted to leave Singapore as soon as possible to forget watever that has held me back, the other part yet, is starting to miss watever or whomever I adore in my life here. What will happened when Im gone ? Will all be the same when Im back ? A person once encourages me that when Im young, I ought to take a look at the world outside. At that moment, i felt it was totally true. However, now that it is about to come, the devil is trying to encrypt my heart with something call fear.
Hope that the few months in Hungary will be the start of another phase in my life.
I have mixed feelings now. A part of me wanted to leave Singapore as soon as possible to forget watever that has held me back, the other part yet, is starting to miss watever or whomever I adore in my life here. What will happened when Im gone ? Will all be the same when Im back ? A person once encourages me that when Im young, I ought to take a look at the world outside. At that moment, i felt it was totally true. However, now that it is about to come, the devil is trying to encrypt my heart with something call fear.
Hope that the few months in Hungary will be the start of another phase in my life.
Tuesday, September 02, 2008
Nice Nice
A nice sunset shot of the beautiful skyscrapers of our nation ! Hee... I can be a photographer soon...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)